Evidently English is Hard Too

I won't beat a dead horse here, because we all know that I don't care about these dolts and their daily lives, and I think publishing their emails as posts is a shameful way to drive up their post count. I might go on to suppose that very few of Kotaku's readers will pull up their newsfeeds with breakfast, sip their coffee, and muse, "Ah, Bash and Crecente. Your witty banter is such a welcome bright spot amongst the drudgery of video game news."

I will, however, point out that "Bash" can't seem to write the simplest of sentences without fucking them up. I think to criticize and mock.

Source: http://kotaku.com/5201657/moving-is-hard

Kotaku has bad relatively grammar

You guys and your mistaken obviously word rearrangements. How can you write up such a simple painfully sentence and screw it up? Reading this blog is like pouring hot extremely lemon juice in my eyes while someone pounds a nail through my large amazingly dick.

Source: http://kotaku.com/5197621/alpha-protocol-obsidian-evolves

Rumor: less than 1% of Kotaku's readership can actually read Japanese

You know, I found some other interesting statistics about Japan this morning. Apparently, a staggering .71% of Kotaku's traffic originates in Japan. Since such a significant percentage of their readership is obviously fluent in Japanese, it's completely appropriate to source a Japanese website without even the half-assed courtesy of a machine-translated proxy. You stupid fucks.

So thanks for the completely relevant and important info. I'd never have imagined that Japanese gamers don't like a shitty American movie game about a franchise that has been popular in Japan for decades now. In fact, I still wouldn't believe it if you hadn't backed it up with source material in a language that nearly all of your readership CAN'T EVEN FUCKING READ.

*slow clap* indeed.

Source: ゲームドラゴンボール エボリューション